Fantastic 4 (2005)

Marvel releases a movie based on another one of its popular comics of the same name. This movie is something to relish if you are a fan of special effects, but to dread if it has little to no character development or plot. The movie tries to rush into the introduction of the main characters but does not use its spare capacity to develop the heroes and villains adequately. For children it is a fun-filled flick, but for adults it is silly and incompetent. 

I have watched the movies Blade (1998) and X-Men (2000) and I must note that this movie derives a similar plot device from these movies. Jonny Storm is the only character who enjoys his gift whereas everyone else, particularly Ben Grimm, denounces theirs. I can sympathize with Ben for the loss of his humanity and the love of his life, but Reed and Susan are just wet blankets. Their gifts are of immense benefit which I know everyone envies them for. Yet they are urging to turn back to normal. Fate has smiled upon them and they just spit in its face.

Yes you are, Jonny. Yes, you are.

So just like the comics, the four are given powers as a result of a cosmic storm they did not anticipate correctly. But rather than enjoy their powers and savor the shower of fame and glory, they, except Jonny, shy away from the crowd. In fact, the first third of the movie dwells on the four discovering their new-found powers and trying to come to terms with the changes. The X-Men, Spider-Man, and even Blade go out to get involved in certain adventures. But in this movie the Four do not go out saving lives and further understand their powers and themselves. Instead, they work out how to revert to their normality, argue over dealing with each other's character, and bombard each other with various cliches.

Above: despite the fact that Jonny's clothes are not made up of unstable molecules, they remain unburnt in this scenario whereas during his snowboarding, his clothes were singed. Unstable molecules adapted to each superpower, so ordinary clothes would not. And how did this small girl lose her mom? Is her mom that careless?!

It would take more than half an hour for the helicopters and the boat to converge on the very scene of the accident at the same time.

Technically speaking, Ben is the cause of all this disorder and so no one with a right mindset would hail him a hero.

I think you are bankrupt because of this. No wonder you have had a tough year.

So there is a villain called Doctor Doom a.k.a. Victor Von Doom. I know it is based on the comics and all, but doesn't the name "Doom" actually give away the fact that Doctor Doom is destined to be a villain? That's just like Sinestro from DC's Green Lantern, whose name was an indicator that he was destined to turn evil.
So what drove him to villainy in the first place? He loses his company, repute and billions of dollars thanks to Richard's flawed calculations, and is affected by the cosmic storm just like the group despite hiding behind the shields. But his motive still seems vague in one's mind.

 This is one of those movies where scientific errors are regular. I have just researched on titanium and learned that its melting point is 1941 K and its boiling point is 3560 K. Yet Jonny burns at 4000 K and his heat does not melt nor boil the metal at any point. Worst of all is that Susan and Reed are too unconvincing as scientists. First, Susan tells Jonny that 4000 K is the temperature of the center of the sun. To a real scientist, fusion only occurs at no less than a million degrees Celsius (or Kelvin). Second, Reed tells Jonny that he could set fire to the earth's atmosphere. This is grossly wrong because the atmosphere is 78% nitrogen and 21% oxygen, and it is this composition that prevents the air from igniting.

You will notice that throughout this movie, Ben's weight changes constantly. One minute his weight buckles a metal bed, the next he can sit on a metal chair or wooden furniture without the same impact. Did nobody pay attention on set when these inconsistencies were prevalent?

Hey Sue. Why don't you cast a force field and withhold Jonny in place(?) So Jonny Storm is a smart-ass and an annoying younger brother of Susan's. The deal with this guy is that he loves attention and can not resist the chance when he learns his ability. Susan Storm is a maternal sister to Jonny, but she has issues of her own without having to watch Jonny's every action. She has Victor who wants her hand in marriage but hesitates; Reed who keeps on delaying to make his move on her; and the fact that she cannot go out into public without running into a crowd of worshipers, and turning invisible (and naked) to evade them all. Susan is just one of those women whose hormones kick in and cause a turbulence in her system as a result of her emotional distress. Reed is a nerd who can't make his move on Susan, even though he has been going out with her since high school. No wonder Susan just loves to take out all her frustration on him.

Isn't it convenient that the dub has been aired immediately after a scene of chaos? It's almost as evident as in Spider-Man 1 & 2 except that it takes time.

Did you know that after the MC commends Jonny for his exhibitionism, the rap by Lloyd Banks "On Fire" starts playing. It is a coincident that this track was produced before this movie hit the theaters. And what prompted him to partake in this X-sport event when he has not for one day ever expressed interest in such sport in the first place? Like I said, he was just hungry for media attention and basks in the crowd. Watch out for product placements!

Ben Grimm must probably be the only character to develop. He does not fit in because he suffers the most from the cosmic storm: he turns into a golem and loses the love of his life. He wants to turn back to normal, and has to deal with his struggle. He finds a new love, a blind girl named Alicia who can say nothing to belittle him the more. This must be convenient. He must understand later that his power is no more a curse than he initially thought.

This movie suffers from repetitive dialogue, second-grade fan fiction, lazy writing and unlovable actors playing cool characters. This movie does not follow the formula that kept previous comic movies in the limelight of acclaim. It spent so much on set design and special effects, but did not give room to enjoy this movie based on the comics we read, or on which the animated series were based on.